Motherhood - Not for the faint of heart

My picture of hell: one soggy rainy day, two healthy energetic children, three solid days of DVDs, one dog that needs to pee but refuses to get wet, and me. Alone with the carnage and contracted to get 4 hours of work done. And just to frost the cake, Lucie can take off her pooy diaper now, which delights us all, but especially the dog, to no end. These days it is sort of a toss up for who has left the pile on the carpet. Lucie? Dog? The fact that it landed on top of a princess high heel is good indication the culprit was of the two-legged, shoe-loving, Oreo-eating variety, which makes it only slightly less disgusting to remove behind a 28-ply Kleenex.

Pray for sunshine.

Comments

Anne said…

Sounds real fun. Flannery mushed a toy into her poopy diaper this morning. Yay. Fortunately Gary was on diaper duty.

January 5, 2008 at 10:46 AM

Unknown said…

That does sound thrilling. Do call me next time you have a day like that--I will come over and help for awhile.

January 6, 2008 at 10:48 AM

Lucie and the Problem of Evil

Lucie has suddenly started questioning things. And by things, I mean eternal things. It all started when she asked if I would read her a bedtime story from the Bible storybook. The book opens innocently enough with the story of creation. There are lions and tigers and bears, and naked people being created from dust. (At this point in the story you’d think questions would arise, but no, kids just seem to go along with it at face value. Which is exactly the reason I've had to work so hard to convince Lucie that turtleneck shirts are not actually made from the necks of turtles.) Anyways ... "Do you know why Adam and Eve are sad?" I asked, pointing at the picture of them sorrowfully leaving the garden. "I sure do, " Lucie assured me. "They are sad because they don't have any parents." Impressive, huh? Clearly, she’d been processing and following along. "Well there is that," I prodded her, "and also they have to leave the ...

Road Trip Games

Being on the road with the kids as the lone adult is a test of endurance. We were a mere 30-minutes into a 6-hour drive when the first “Are we there yet?” was heard, and only an hour after that when "I have to go to the bathroom" surfaced. I had packed a big fat bag of books and crafts with high hopes that the children would arrive at Grandpa and Grandma's cheerful and rested, even though Lucie did have to wait an hour for her dinner. At the point when fidgeting and poking and simmering restlessness was about to boil over into mutiny, I came up with a game to unite the troops and distract them from their captivity. I grilled each of them in turn, asking all sorts of up-close-and-personal questions about their goals and future plans. Their answers and the laughter made us forget that we were hungry and out-of-sorts. Grayson plans to live in Austin, Texas, so that he can have a farm in the big wide open. He's not sure why more people don't live on farms where...

I Scream, You Scream

My mom and dad risked shame and flogging by wrapping up a kitchen appliance for my birthday. My mom, knowing how I feel about presents that plug-in, questioned Rob twice: "Are you sure that's what she wants?" But I did want it very much, and I'm not ashamed to say it: I'm in love with an ice cream maker. July is National Ice Cream month, and my family is doing our part to celebrate. We've sampled and modified a number of homemade ice cream experiments, and have narrowed it down to two recipes that everyone loves. Think of this post as a Wagner Family Ice Cream Cookbook. The competition is by no means closed. July is a long, hot month and we are always willing to whip up another batch. Submit your favorite homemade ice cream recipe in the comments section below. (Particularly if you've got one that tastes like Haagen Dazs Coffee, hint hint.) Happy freezing! And remember: there is almost nothing that ice cream can't fix. COPYCAT PINKB...

Montecito Mama

Search This Blog